An opera? About a woman? How deliciously absurd!

“Have you ever tried simply turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them?”.

-Bender Rodriguez

Also “Not gonna lie…” to start a sentence. Well thank you for that decency?

My cars name is also Bort.

TIL Gawd makes bullets fly with the shell still attached

Pretty Patties!

My stray kitten wouldn’t let me cut her claws so I tried the mobile vet. They handed her back to me and said it wasn’t worth the fight, and her sister was free.

So, your father was a Woman?

You wouldn’t download a ham

Step 1, you’re gonna want to sit your ass down. That’s a clean bong rip with no water, you gon’ die.

They used the song for an American win at the 2012 London Olympics, as well as “Werewolves of London” for a British win, a song with the line “little old lady got mutilated last night”.

This is how Equifax was “hacked”. They had a remote server with those credentials, which someone used to steal all our info. Equifax paid like $10 per person in fines and said “teehee our bad”.

I’m not your buddy, guy.

He’s ok at drawing, but not understanding basic math such as “which number is greater” or “Trump lost by 7 million votes and 70 electoral college votes” is not his talent.

Skilled paid stonemasons were required to build the tight fitting surface stones of this one, so some of the laborers were definitely not slaves, howeveri believe you’re correct I doubt the sled drag team was salary.

I only give away the first one free, after that they keep getting the sugar cravings and come back to me for more

I am the Greetest! Now I am leaving Earth for no raisin!

Exactly. We have 50 years of computer driven exponential growth and not a fucking thing is better for us. We don’t work less, travel more, be richer, live a better life, or have a better future for the planet. It should make everyone anti-capitalist.

A heel dragging regressive policy opinion should always be met as such. The world will never go back to the Wild West with gun laws, whites owning everything, women are property etc; to have a political viewpoint desiring these things and feel that it is correct is laughable.

If you were slower he pushed you out of the way, it’s everyone’s dream on the interstate these days.