As a fellow GF human because of a colitis condition, the LMNT works well for me. I usually mix it with 2-3x the water recommendation to chill out the taste a bit, but it works wonders. My whole family has a genetic issue that leaves us super vulnerable to dehydration, but I can’t stand chugging so much sugar all the time from other “sports” drinks. LMNT and just DIY electrolyte drinks (water, salt, lemon) have helped a lot.

I guess you’ll have to build a giant metal effigy in the center of your home at this point. Or become a wizard to better channel your new magical energies. It’s really your call now.

I too live in a hilariously dry climate in the winter and become a human lightning rod for several months at a time. Here’s what helped me: a quarter! I carry a quarter in my pocket all winter to touch to metal (I deeply hate getting shocked myself, especially the huge static charges). You’ll need something made of metal that is grounded, though. We have metal shelves or the aforementioned light switch screws. You can also look for screws on your washing machine, doorknob, dishwasher, sink, etc. Anything with a little metal should work. Then - touch the quarter to it, hear (but don’t feel) the zap, and enjoy your dog with no fear. Hope you can find something metallic somewhere in your home!