Fun fact, this is why I got laid so much in Mexico. I took so much straight dong on that trip I should have gotten frequent fliers miles

I’ve mentioned it on here before, I think. It’s one of my favorite stories. The look on his face was absolutely horrific and hilarious. I asked him several times afterwards how his pregnant sinuses were. He did not find it as funny as I did.

But not from Tennessee.

🎶I got a brand new pair of roller skates you got skint you knees, let’s get to together and touch together our peepees🎶

I love telling this story, but I’ll warn beforehand it’s explicit.

! so, one time I was getting a blow job from this dude who was sort of newly out as bi curious. So, he asked if he could suck me off because he’d never done it before. Anyway, when I came, he didn’t pull off and decided he was going to swallow, and since he was still really new and nervous, I thought it would be hilarious if I said “no homo” when I came.

Unfortunately, he also thought that was hilarious, and laughed while swallowing. Ever seen milk come out of a kids nose in the cafeteria? That. But with spunk !<

We all know the answer to this. Alfred keeps a large supply of BatCoke for him in the Bat Cave

Can I know what that religion is?

I can’t find a source right now, because I just woke up and I don’t want to, so (Trust Me Bro, et al, 2024) but there’s a chance that quote is actually about Nazis!

A lot of French people referred to them as “the others” and would often speak sort of semi-codedly about them in writing and such so as not to piss off their new overlords. So that line may well not have been “I’m such an introvert that being around other humans is like being in hell” but instead “hell has delivered itself to my doorstep in the form of goose-stepping bastards”

I once had a conversation with a cashier in TN that started with a newspaper by check out saying something about remembrance day in England. I explained it’s basically like their version of Memorial Day. It ended with me having to explain what Europe is. A super abridged synopsis:

Me: It’s basically their version of Memorial Day.

Her: why do they need a different version?

Me: they’re a different country, different laws.

Her: it’s not really a different country if you can drive to it

Me:… What

Her: I mean, it’s basically just the same country

Me: you cannot drive to England.

Her: you can’t?

Me: it’s an island.

Her: I thought it was Europe?

Me: you also cannot drive to Europe.

I then had to explain what Europe was, how England is Europe in the same way Puerto Rico is North America. I shouldn’t have included that. Or tried to explain armistice day. It was a very long conversation that ended up going outside during her smoke break.

She was the second grown adult I had to explain Europe to. Tennessee has failed it’s children, y’all. I’m not being funny, and contrary to OP’s premise, I don’t really judge them for this. I judge the state and the school system. It’s bad.

If someone is cleaning a floor and I have to walk over it, they’re getting several sorrys and at least 2 thank yous, while I do that shrink my body to the side and putting my palms out towards them like a peasant not trying to be whipped by a landed gentry.

I’ve mopped professionally. It sucks.

If you claim you have a religious for needing them back (reunification being pretty common, as in, you need them so you can be buried with them) then they will run their tests, and give them back to you if they’re not a hazard.

My brother used this to keep his gallbladder, and a friend of a friend kept her foot after diabetes took it. Both examples in Tennessee. I don’t know if it matters which state you’re in, but I’m positive the country would probably make a difference.

Plus, I think it’s funny the idea of some medical person somewhere trying to square their incredibly narrow view of religion with a trans woman being so devout in their own faith as to be concerned about burial practices potentially decades in the future, given the stereotype that everyone LGBTQ+ is an evil atheist.

As a religious person, I will absolutely sleep with your partner while you’re stuck in traffic.

I love a nap. I’m always sleepy, and if you’re stuck in traffic and I’m bored, imma be sleepin.

Question. I am a computer dumb. Is this scary for me? Lol.

This. Exactly this. I’m dying to know.

relevant short (pun intended)

Could also consider sitting on items like cakes or balloons, or eating large quantities of foods on camera in a messy way. Peeing on stuff is another popular option.

Sweet! Thanks for the reco!

This is bringing a tear to my eye. It’s fuckin beautiful

Oh this is amazing. What’s dough and ray, though?

Anytime!

And I’m sure there are much better introductions, but Vivekananda is a downright gas to learn about. Either the first or second (I forget) blog post was an introduction to the Swamiji and his address at the world’s parliament of religion. I hope you enjoy. :)