I went from “socially liberal, fiscally conservative” in high school to liberal to communist to anarchist back to communist now I think I’m democratic socialist in my 30s? Just basic safety nets and unions, please.

This may not work for everyone, but I pull what hair I can out as I wash it and slap it on the walls. Then I swirl it up to throw away after. I hardly ever have to snake it back out, maybe once every few years.

Maybe they don’t take hot enough showers? I don’t always sweat, but for sure I’ve noticed more from taking hot baths

Ok. I guess you think I’m being an elitist, so I just asked an LLM “What are the most popular concepts in psychology understood by the overall population, and what metrics do you use to determine that?” Chopping down the responses, I got: Cognitive Dissonance, Confirmation Bias, Personality Types (like Myers Briggs), Freud’s Psychoanalysis, Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, Behaviorism, IQ and Intelligence Testing, Positive Reinforcement, Depression and Anxiety, and Mindfulness and Meditation.

That’s based on search engines trends, social media mentions, media representation, surveys and polls, academic citations and book sales.

A few of those are outdated concepts, but it takes time for the general public to catch up. So, I’m not sure this supports how people in general might be skeptical of the field. It’s healthy to have some skepticism, but I was referring to people that will take one example and act like it discredits the whole field. That is some poor critical thinking that I doubt many actually believe. The same people I’ve argued with on sex/gender will also gladly talk about the benefits of some of the stuff the LLM brought up, too. There’s just a lot of societal indoctrination and sexist reasoning to try to discredit that specific theory.

Sorry I’m going a bit into AuDHD mode here. I like talking about this stuff but if it’s too much I’ll stop

And you use Ted talks to see what’s most popular??

Where are you getting the idea that’s one of the most widely known findings? I’m genuinely asking, I hadn’t heard about it in years.

Thank you for the reply! I’ve never been big on etymology but I might need to get more into it, that’s so neat.

The replication is actually evidence to me of moral reasoning. There are limits to the types of experiments we can or should be willing to perform. Power posing was never considered an entire scientific model like the sex/gender distinction.

Being mentally unstable isn’t a character flaw. We should be encouraging everyone to get help. A good therapist knows what a delusion looks like, what the criteria are, and how to develop a relationship with the client to gently challenge them.

I did a little deep dive on them recently when I realized I was talking to a narcissist with grandiose delusions claiming experts in sociology and such “made up” the gender/sex distinction and, whaddya know, he thinks narcissism is a made-up disorder, too. He’s been around our discord server for months and I finally popped off and posted the criteria along with how his multitude of claims fit. He understandable got pissed, but at least everyone else is aware what the criteria is now and how to walk through it themselves. (And to be clear, I only weaponized the term against him because he referred to people using neutral pronouns - such as myself, as he is well aware - delusional).

If you hold a belief with absolute conviction that has been falsified, shown counter evidence, and it impacts your functioning in society, then you may have a delusional belief. It’s not uncommon or a big deal once you can recognize it and work out the logic.

We really just need to be teaching psych in high schools, honestly. Destigmatize it. Ik I’m stigmatizing narcissism a bit here, so lemme add that being a narcissist doesn’t mean a person will act as abusively (if at all) as the individual I’ve been dealing with is, nor does abuse imply a mental disorder. It gets nuanced but I think it’s fascinating

Ooo what do you call cotton candy?

Soft sciences in general need to be covered more in the fields OP mentioned! Psych and philosophy should be taught in high school, too. The amount of arrogant asshole STEM majors I’ve met that think experts in sociology and psychology are just making shit up is too damn high. Ironically I did a deep dive on delusions recently and it’s wild realizing that’s what some of these folks are suffering from.

To be clear - delusions are not a character flaw. We all probably have had a few in our lifetime. The fucks I’m thinking of just push their delusions onto others and become emotionally abusive by weaponizing the term against people for shit like preferring neutral pronouns. They don’t bother to ask why someone (like me) might have the preference.

/tangent

Face, pits, downstairs mix!

Hey, I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to respond but you had nothing to apologize for! I appreciated the conversation and had some confusion, but that’s why I originally commented to get clarification:) I enjoyed the chat, though, and hope you’re doing well!

This thread has been a gold mine for me OP, thank you 😂❤️

Oh gotcha, I totally agree it’s not a big part at all! Honestly, I didn’t experience an orgasm until well after I became sexually active, and very rarely with a partner since. It’s extremely important to me as I’m back “on the market” now and have really struggled in past relationships with it. I enjoy the whole aspect to it, exploring whole bodies, but I would very much like to find a relationship where my partner prioritizes helping me climax and has some patience with me on it.

By chance, did you talk with your gyno about vaginismus? Not sure if I’m spelling that right, but I’ve had a few friends mention that it’s painful, one friend saying she couldn’t wear tampons or anything. I could see why orgasming first would help the muscles to relax

My understanding is 80% of people with a uterus don’t climax from penetration, not that we find it necessarily unenjoyable (which is true for me, too; I do need clitoral stimulation to climax). I’ve taken courses on women’s studies, feminist philosophy, etc. to overcome the problematic religious attitudes my parents had, too - and lots of therapy! I’ll see if my library has that book available, though. I’m always interested in learning more.

I’m really sorry you had that experience growing up, though, that’s awful. As normal as our experiences felt to us having privacy invaded and all the shame, that much shouldn’t be normalized! I’m glad you’ve found what works for you, and I wish you all the most pleasurable experiences around it throughout the rest of your life 💝

Well, not that I think it has to be your experience by any means, that’s part of the beauty of life - we’re all a bit different and into different things. I do quite enjoy penetration without need for lube (I mean, I do need to have natural lube, obviously). I usually get myself there with just hands and might use a dildo when I’m worked up enough. Vibrators are great, no doubt. I don’t typically use toys, though, honestly. I did more in my teens when I was ignorant to how my body worked lol. Which is why I wrote the OG comment…I didn’t have appropriate toys, and it caused some shame on occasion. I knew it felt good but didn’t feel safe talking to my parents about it.

Uhh. Hi, woman here…RIP my inbox but I think it’s important parents talk to teenagers of all genders about this and consider having them look for toys they can experiment with if they express interest. Just because we don’t orgasm from penetration doesn’t mean it feels bad lol. Better they have toys available so they’re less likely to use something inappropriate.

So, we shouldn’t feed people because capitalism. Got it.

If you want to call it a theory then I suggest working to have it peer reviewed. Otherwise, just call it a hypothesis. I see issues with it, personally, but I’m just one person and am not an expert. I’m finishing my undergrad in psych, but the rest of my comment is based purely on recreational study following experts in personality disorders and extensive therapy myself.

Main thing I’d note is that most people will show some level of narcissistic traits, but meeting the full criteria to label anyone anti authoritarian as narcissistic goes against the point you make in the first few paragraphs that we shouldn’t be so quick to throw the term around. Feeling entitled to better pay on it’s own can be justified, especially if it’s in tandem with wanting fellow workers to receive that same benefit. Quite empathetic, actually. Turning off empathy in specific settings also suggests it’s not a pervasive trait, which is an important piece of the DSM that was not mentioned.

I definitely see the argument that some anarchists will meet the criteria. And I agree with a good, maybe even majority of the points, like reducing stigma. Plus, it’s expensive to get through an offical peer review process, and you’re right that many folks with NPD could never afford that. But I think it would help to at least include some expert opinions and case study examples to support what seems to be mostly anecdotal testimony. Or if you have been diagnosed yourself, build on that as a primary case study example (cuz you do call yourself one, but it’s not clear if you went through an assessment for it).

Super interesting idea, though - I’m gonna save it to reread and mull it over some more. Props on getting it published, for sure!

Ninja edit: Holy shit this turned into a much longer comment than I intended, sorry!