So, I just went ahead and wrote out basically everything in this comment chain. Most of what I described of my disease before has been a simplification because it’s too complicated to describe in a simple post, but some people had concerns, so I finally described it in detail. I had previously left out a lot of details pertaining to progression and the fact that most of the early disease activity correlates with physical events surrounding a herniated spinal disc, before increasingly going rogue and progressing all on its own. A couple of doctors gave me some good insights, but the disease is still largely mysterious.

Don’t worry; I’m not planning on doing anything drastic. The urgency is moreso a desire to have peace of mind that everything I write will be published. The passage of time makes me feel uneasy now because my disease is now touching vital functions. Most people assume they will wake up the next day, but I feel like I can’t fully make that assumption anymore. I want to secure my ability to leave a legacy. Once I do, the stakes won’t be so high; I can be more at peace with the situation and won’t have to worry about the odds.

I’m very unlikely to die tomorrow or this week. I will most likely survive for a bit longer, perhaps a few months or so. This writing thing is a long-term process, more of a retirement activity that I work on every day rather than something I do all at once. I just feel like the odds of survival each day are closer to 499 in 500 rather than 99,999 in 100,000. The true odds are, of course, unknowable, so I am forced to work off of intuition.

I am still seeking a diagnosis. I’m currently pursuing a sleep study, visit with a neuro-opthalmalogist, and a visit with a new neurologist so I can have fresh eyes on this disease in light of the new evidence. I’m hoping that there is enough progression now that the damage will be radiologically significant. The problem is that I am still months away from them, and I don’t know how long it will take to finally get a full diagnosis, so I want to prepare for the worst ahead of time so I can leave behind a large collection of art and things I’ve made. But I agree with you that there is always a chance that this is survivable; I just cannot know right now. The chaotic breathing is quite concerning, steering me towards accepting the worst outcomes. But I am by no means giving up.

The bottom line is that the only time I can guarantee exists is now, with the probability of each subsequent second existing following a gradual exponential decay curve that we cannot directly measure. The solution to this problem is to set up the website and stuff for my family now anyway, no matter who’s right or wrong. No matter if my disease or something completely random gets me. No matter if I live for 5 more days or 5 more years. I just feel strongly about keeping a record of myself, and I know that if I had a different serious health problem, I would do the same thing. I have simply crossed a threshold where I am not comfortable with the risk anymore.

Perhaps I’ve made the impression of having a volatile or unhinged personality, and although this time is pretty stressful, it hasn’t prevented me from enjoying the things I do, writing about my ideas, and even trying art. I might seem a bit manic with my impassioned rant, but really, that was just something I had a lot of fun writing. I was always really awestruck by the nature of existence, and I don’t usually swear that much, so I thought swearing like crazy here would be a good way to communicate the magnitude of my appreciation.

I appreciate your concerns and criticisms, though.

You basically have to get lucky. The model is able to get shorter strings of text correct more consistently, but it still took several tries to get something that looked good.

I’m using Bing Image Creator, which integrated DALL-E 3 on the backend recently. From what I’ve seen so far, it looks like you get 100 free generations every 24 hours.

Yeah, that happened to me several times too. I think a lot of people quickly jumped on it and whatever they have going on in the backend is scaling poorly and returning blank generations. It worked well for 20 minutes right after launch, so a lot of my results were from that.

EDIT: I just got 100 more boosts after about 24 hours, so it seems that they periodically replenish after you run out.

I used Bing Image Creator, which integrated Dall-E 3 on the backend yesterday. It gives you 100 fast generations before it becomes unusably slow, so make them count!

Yep! It’s been really fun to mess around with… well until my preview credits ran out, anyway :P

I… I do!

It’s so devastating because if Nintendo finds out, you face 100 years in a maximum security prison

My new friend Lemmy is so cool, he’d never hang out with someone like spez!

Meowth has been acting different ever since he put on that frog suit

at the same time when other people end their texts with hard .‘s it makes me wonder if they’re angry

Yep, that’s why I do it in the first place lol. I learned a bunch of phrases and behaviors that cause me to overthink, then I avoid doing them to help my fellow overthinkers feel more comfortable

I like to use “lol” because sometimes using a period looks too serious and I want to show that I’m being casual lol