For serious, the “masculine” culture is pure trash. Jocks and bullies in school, frat houses in college, dumb fans getting in fights as adults… Machismo is mostly toxic.
Far too many peoples’ idea of “manly” is just, “asshole pushing their opinion on others”. To clarify, simply expressing an opinion is not pushing it. There are also plenty of healthy “manly” qualities, but you never hear good guys running around gloating about how they don’t beat their wife.
Culture isn’t defined by the masses, but the mouthy.
Yea. I’d say that’s just an extension of how toxic masculinity reinforces jouvenile behavior. It shows up in sororities too because that is still an environment aimed at reinforcing the jouvenile’s concept of “freedom”.
It’s a good indicator of why machismo-like thinking is so troublesome and pervasive, especially for men: It’s simply someone trying to hold on to a child’s understanding of the world… and males, especially those blinded by rage or hornyness, are notorious for childish thought.
Honestly, as a guy, I’m more and more starting to feel the same. There’s so much dumb or hurtful shit happening under the premise of “boys being boys”. It’s making me hate basically everything about men and being male. Luckily there are plenty of us who are chill, so I look for those. But seeing some men being impulsive, aggressive, dominant, offensive assholes is definitely becoming more and more frustrating. It’s painful to look back how much of this behaviour was just programmed into our brains as normal.
The problem isn’t all men, but too many men. Whenever I feel misandry bubbling up because of “man did common bad thing again”, I think of all my male friends. I love them too much to feel any hate. They are good people. Same goes for most men at my gym. They encourage rather than put down.
Had a guy argue with me for longer than I should have engaged that the problem was toxic feminism and that women’s standards are causing this. That women are raising their sons wrong.
Like, my guy, who is imposing this standard of machismo on men but other men? Who’s calling guys pussies for ordering ‘girly’ drinks at the pub? I’ve never seen a woman do that. Who’s bullying guys in locker rooms for not being manly enough? Women aren’t even in there.
Your problem isn’t feminism, it’s toxic masculinity, enforced by other men. But go ahead and blame women for your problems. We’re used to it by now.
If it makes you feel better, I’ve never once in five decades had private talks with my girlfriends where any of them said a guy wasn’t manly for having feelings or not being a lumberjack-type. Quite the opposite, in fact. Women in my circles fawned over guys who had empathy and didn’t give a fuck what anyone thought about it. Even our teenage heartthrobs were called girly-men by guys.
I mean, yeah. Toxic masculinity doesn’t come from women, it comes from the patriarchy. It’s all fucking bad for everyone. Worse for women, undoubtedly, but it’s really fucking bad for most men too.
For serious, the “masculine” culture is pure trash. Jocks and bullies in school, frat houses in college, dumb fans getting in fights as adults… Machismo is mostly toxic.
Far too many peoples’ idea of “manly” is just, “asshole pushing their opinion on others”. To clarify, simply expressing an opinion is not pushing it. There are also plenty of healthy “manly” qualities, but you never hear good guys running around gloating about how they don’t beat their wife.
Culture isn’t defined by the masses, but the mouthy.
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Yea. I’d say that’s just an extension of how toxic masculinity reinforces jouvenile behavior. It shows up in sororities too because that is still an environment aimed at reinforcing the jouvenile’s concept of “freedom”.
It’s a good indicator of why machismo-like thinking is so troublesome and pervasive, especially for men: It’s simply someone trying to hold on to a child’s understanding of the world… and males, especially those blinded by rage or hornyness, are notorious for childish thought.
Honestly, as a guy, I’m more and more starting to feel the same. There’s so much dumb or hurtful shit happening under the premise of “boys being boys”. It’s making me hate basically everything about men and being male. Luckily there are plenty of us who are chill, so I look for those. But seeing some men being impulsive, aggressive, dominant, offensive assholes is definitely becoming more and more frustrating. It’s painful to look back how much of this behaviour was just programmed into our brains as normal.
The problem isn’t all men, but too many men. Whenever I feel misandry bubbling up because of “man did common bad thing again”, I think of all my male friends. I love them too much to feel any hate. They are good people. Same goes for most men at my gym. They encourage rather than put down.
Had a guy argue with me for longer than I should have engaged that the problem was toxic feminism and that women’s standards are causing this. That women are raising their sons wrong.
Like, my guy, who is imposing this standard of machismo on men but other men? Who’s calling guys pussies for ordering ‘girly’ drinks at the pub? I’ve never seen a woman do that. Who’s bullying guys in locker rooms for not being manly enough? Women aren’t even in there.
Your problem isn’t feminism, it’s toxic masculinity, enforced by other men. But go ahead and blame women for your problems. We’re used to it by now.
As a guy, yeah guys might say those things, I was definitely worried that women were thinking those things.
Now that I am older, I give much less of a fuck. And I feel healthier for it.
If it makes you feel better, I’ve never once in five decades had private talks with my girlfriends where any of them said a guy wasn’t manly for having feelings or not being a lumberjack-type. Quite the opposite, in fact. Women in my circles fawned over guys who had empathy and didn’t give a fuck what anyone thought about it. Even our teenage heartthrobs were called girly-men by guys.
I’m glad you don’t give a fuck. Stay healthy. :)
I mean, yeah. Toxic masculinity doesn’t come from women, it comes from the patriarchy. It’s all fucking bad for everyone. Worse for women, undoubtedly, but it’s really fucking bad for most men too.