Or just “I don’t do drugs”, or “I don’t do recreational drugs”?
Or “I don’t smoke weed” and “I don’t drink alcohol” when they come up, separately?
I wouldn’t generally say it at all unless I’m in a situation where I’m offered recreational drugs such as cannabis or alcohol.
My understanding is the term ‘straight edge’ might be more well known than ‘teetotal’, but neither are completely known by everyone.
I take straight edge to mean not doing any recreational drugs. However I read that straight edge can have punk culture connotations that some people might maintain are part of it. Like I might meet a punk straight edger who claims I’m not really straight edge unless I have connections to the punk scene. They also apparently often claim you need to be vegan to be straight edge, I am vegan though coincidentally but not for reasons relating to straight edge culture.
Teetotal I believe most often means abstinence from simply alcohol, but can be used to mean abstaining from all recreational drugs (I think). It may be more well known as just not drinking alcohol. For example teetotallers often still smoke weed.
Apologies if I misrepresented any of these terms.
If “no, thanks” is not treated as a complete sentence, you’re in a bad crowd. Doesn’t matter if it’s beer with the coworkers or MDMA at a trippy cuddle party. “No” requires no further elaboration.
If you feel like discussing your reasons, feel free to bring them up. But you should not have to. If your “no” is not accepted about drugs, get out – because those people are in the habit of rejecting people’s “no” on other things, too.
And by the way, this rule is just as important, maybe more so, for people who do choose to take recreational drugs sometimes. Just because I’m okay having a beer in one context does not oblige me to do shots with your buddies.
Yea, they get a “No, thank you”. If they persist after that they get a “Fuck off”. I don’t owe anyone an explanation. Fortunately my friends I go out with will back me up if anyone gets pissed about my attitude.
What are these trippy cuddle parties and where can one find them?
Asking for a friend obviously
It’s a situation where the label carries a burden. How often does it come up that you need a prepared response? No judgement, but If you’re thinking this much about it you might be hanging out with the wrong crowd. “No thanks” should be enough, and being pressured further into doing something you don’t want to do is a red flag. I don’t think either label is going to help you.
Or “I don’t smoke weed” and “I don’t drink alcohol” when they come up, separately
That ones your best choice.
I find that adding an “…anymore” adds a lot of baggage that’ll make people drop it and accept your choices
“Not since… The incident…”
“What happened?”
“I don’t talk about it… anymore…”
Eh, just a plain ol “nah, it’s not my thing” has sufficed whenever I’ve been offered a hit.
Don’t be weird about it and they won’t either.
Just say no thanks. No need to tell them that it’s a life long choice.
Anybody worth talking to won’t care what you call it friend.
If you’re in a party or other social event keep a drink with you, water or whatever you like. When someone offers you something just bring your glass up and say thanks, im fine. 9/10 times people are going to be cool with that. Someone might ask you what are you drinking, being honest is the best imo, you can start a conversation about it. Do not say things like “I don’t need alcohol/drugs to enjoy a party” it’s sounds condescending and like you’re moraly superior, you are not. If someone asks if you already tried, say yes but you didn’t really like it. If they try to pressure you, just leave, they are shitty people.
I don’t smoke and barely drink. I don’t even like caffeine. I don’t need labels about it. It doesn’t make me a teetotaler or straight edge. I like cookies and ice cream more than any of that stuff!
I actually think it can be harder to communicate moderation. I have a friend who’s a recovering alcoholic and when he says “I don’t drink” he rarely gets any pushback.
Whereas I do drink sometimes, and even get drunk very occassionally, but can go weeks without it. Some people have trouble with the idea that I drank one time they saw me but are choosing not to the next time. It’s a bit like the way some straight or gay people can’t wrap their heads around the concept of bisexuality… “which one are you? Straight or gay? Teetotal or drinker?” 😂
I had good luck with just “not tonight” as someone who drinks extremely infrequently
My dude, I gave up alcohol 12 years ago and I can feel your question in my bones.
The only responses I’ve found that
don’t causeminimize follow-up bullshit are:“Oh I’m taking antobiotics at the moment and the doc said I can’t drink while I’m on them.”
and
“Sorry, I’m designated driver tonight! I know, it’s so annoying but I promised my gf/friends…”
Anyone you see frequently enough to know these are white lies should be cool with you not drinking/getting high anyway.
Yes, it’s bullshit that you have to lie but I’ve found that telling the truth just leads to drunk/high idiots pestering you and basically not accepting any explanation. Using the white lies above shifts the blame onto someone else, and then people just seem to accept it.
And if your friends don’t respect that you want to stay sober, then you can probably do without them in your life.
“Sorry, I don’t (drink/smoke/whatever - just fill in the blank).”
Alternately, no is a complete sentence: You don’t owe anyone any explanation.
Don’t say “sorry”. You have no reason to apologize.
I live in Wisconsin, and if there’s one thing Wisconsin is known for is a strong drinking culture. I’ve had extremely good luck with simply saying “not tonight” or “no thank you” or at strongest “I have to be good for my drive home”
If you specifically identify yourself as a teetotaler or straight edge or whatever could be interpreted as seeing yourself as better than others who just want to experience an altered state of mind, which is not a good first impression to make.
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People respond best when you just say “no” (sorry to quote Nancy), and don’t try to excuse away your response. Just say no, or no thanks, or nah, or not today, and move on. If they pressure you tell them to back the fuck up.
I’ve seen more people get weird about not drinking alcohol than not smoking weed, personally.
It’s fucling odd. I was at a friends birthday party and his dad was there too. He asked me if i wanted some of his schnaps, or whatever hard liquor it was. I said no thanks. He poured it anyway. I said i’m not gonna drink it. He said it’s really good. I said i don’t drink, so i don’t drink that. He sait it’s really good. I said i don’t drink, so i don’t drink it. He said i can still drive after one shot. I said i don’t want his gross ass shot. This happens pretty much every time. You don’t drink? AT ALL? NEVER? but how? Not even beer? Not even on special occasions? But you drink wine, do you? Not even to a good piece of meat? No, it’s disgusting, even i i would eat meat. YOU DON’T EAT MEAT?
