Truly a pretty terrible place for any kind of social activity.

People here are super self righteous and unwavering in their beliefs, quick to insult others and be generally bitchy, pedantic and quick to dogpile. Worst of all while still usually slightly wrong about a thing, but unwilling to hear it.

It’s basically the worst parts of reddit users where we have boiled it down to the most affluent or socially insecure.

Even if it’s as simple as a question people jump to defend their position with insults rather than answer it cause they get worried the person might be confused and it’s best to just make sure it’s a closed community as quick as possible.

This isn’t an open community it’s a private gated one where everyone jumped the fence and is scared that the wrong person might have come in with them.

Condescending is not welcoming.
Upvoting cause they are your in group isn’t community.
Berating outcasts cause you at least don’t feel like them is still bullying.

  • Admiral Patrick@dubvee.orgM
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    11 days ago

    I see your instance is federated with both Hexbear and Lemmygrad. Going to gesture vaguely at that being the root of your problem (or at least > 90% of it).

    Blocking instances helps, but you’ll still see users from there in the comments and in other communities (not on the blocked instance). Some UIs will hide users from blocked instances. I know Tesseract does (I wrote it to do that), but others might as well.

    My experience here has been pretty great after getting my blocklist and feed curated.

    • Krauerking@lemy.lolOP
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      11 days ago

      Yeah I am also federated with lemmy.world and blocking that would silence the feed a whole lots more while being just as helpful to my psyche.
      The commies are at least consistent and up to date on things. Which is insane since they insist on a economic system from 200 years ago.

      I think the problem I have is that those outside of grad and hexbear also think their shit doesn’t stink but I literally have seen people openly mocking a user for nothing because he made a comment elsewhere that means they keep going after him to punish him for his opinion on anything. It’s cruel and fucking inhuman. It lacks all empathy and it’s not hexbear that was doing it.

      I also don’t want to block people just for existing with other opinions. I couldnt do it in real life. I can choose to not interact.
      Blocking feels like a bandaid for having a terrible community where everyone wants to be alone and right.

      • Blaze (he/him)@sopuli.xyz
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        11 days ago

        I think the problem I have is that those outside of grad and hexbear also think their shit doesn’t stink but I literally have seen people openly mocking a user for nothing because he made a comment elsewhere that means they keep going after him to punish him for his opinion on anything. It’s cruel and fucking inhuman. It lacks all empathy and it’s not hexbear that was doing it.

        Feel free to report this. This should not be tolerated.

        • Krauerking@lemy.lolOP
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          11 days ago

          Hahahahahahaha ohhhh… Yeah like that does anything. I’ve seen mods joke about it just being the person they all gang up on as if it was the thing to do.
          I’ve had some good interactions with mods, but that… Was 1 person actually. Same mod basically.

          The mods are a lot of the same people and someone from “outside” telling them they are horrified just brands you as another target for them to ignore as you get silenced out. The big communities are absolutely the worst offenders.

                • KairuByte@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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                  9 days ago

                  I mean, it’s an active choice by the instance admins at that point. Hexbear and lemmygrad are both well known for being what they are, and db0 is about as well known as a community in general and is one of the generally recommended federation choices.

                  • Blaze (he/him)@sopuli.xyz
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                    9 days ago

                    You didn’t get me.

                    On a small instance, remote communities are only federated if a user subscribes to that community. It wasn’t the case for that community on OP’s instance. It’s a technical issue, no instances politics at hand here

            • Krauerking@lemy.lolOP
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              11 days ago

              Hahaha oh my God that’s kinda fun. Sorta a go scream on a mountain top style solution but a fun one at least.

              • Blaze (he/him)@sopuli.xyz
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                11 days ago

                I filed a few of these reports myself, it’s nice.

                And you can use them to send to people posting to a community held by a powertripper. They help making a change.

        • Krauerking@lemy.lolOP
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          11 days ago

          I know that just fine. So what would knowing that matter or do for me? Or my comment?

          • Dark Arc@social.packetloss.gg
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            11 days ago

            Which is insane since they insist on a economic system from 200 years ago.

            I think it’s just that your argument against communism seemed to be based on its age, i.e. it “being old and out dated.”

            (Agree communism is not great FWIW)

            • Krauerking@lemy.lolOP
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              11 days ago

              Yeah i thought it was a clever dig against it and also fun turn since I think I have had better conversations about modern day pop culture on hexbear.

              I just wasn’t exactly in favor of capitalism anyways just wasn’t the point.

              Thanks for being my sanity check on that.

              • jeffw@lemmy.world
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                11 days ago

                I question what your criteria for a good pop culture discussion is if you enjoy discussions with a bunch of angry neckbeards

                • Krauerking@lemy.lolOP
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                  10 days ago

                  They like to watch modern movies and shows that aren’t marvel, usually have good takes on influencera in here and have the right hate for vtubers.

                  Plus I think they are just closer to my age and social awkward nerds that are easy to call neckbeards. I’m not gonna get pop culture references of Gen X who seem to make a majority in here.

                  • jeffw@lemmy.world
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                    10 days ago

                    Gen X is overrepresented here relative to other social media, you’re correct.

                    It sounds like you’re just espousing super generic hatred for “mainstream” culture though.

                    And let me be clear, a nerd is nothing close to a neckbeard. You can be both, but those are not the same.

      • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
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        11 days ago

        Am a mod of a few smaller communities but I think I speak for a lot of us. We aren’t in every thread, but if you see rule breaking, report it. That’s what we’re there for. I know that sort of behavior is against the rules in my subs.

        • Krauerking@lemy.lolOP
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          10 days ago

          Yeah I think I’ve realized I’m really only seeing the basic big theads on lemmy.world and the moderation there is kill or be killed and whatever the mods giggle at is allowed. Which means they let dogpiling happen if it seems deserved.

          I’m apparently in a rather small instance.

          • Scrubbles@poptalk.scrubbles.tech
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            10 days ago

            The benefit of the smaller instances IMO, you definitely get more control over your feed. Mods are still helpful, but reports do go to admins of your instance too.